Thursday, September 13, 2012

Fire Alarm Lessons

We have a lot of fire alarms here in these parts. Typically they go off at around 3 am which is always a special joy but by the time I find a bra get to the front door, it shuts off. But last night.....last night was what we call a "legit fire alarm." 30 minutes of ear-splitting sirens and strobe lights and an appearance by  a fire engine all ensued before we were allowed back inside. 

And during my time at our block party standing around, I gleaned many insightful things from this fire alarm experience:

-i'm re-thinking getting a fish. I mean, I wouldn't leave the fish (obviously) but I think I'd look pretty silly walking down the hall with my fishy in his bowl. 
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-reallllly should think about your  fire departure outfit Ashley. If the fire is in fact real....you probably don't want to be left with pink shorts and a red tank top as your only clothes in the world. Yeah. 

-I really should travel with mace at all times because I apparently have creepy neighbors like "Jim" who "isn't a stalker" but knows what floor I live on and "recognizes you from college"......5 years ago. ok Jim.  

-My immediate next door neighbor looks like he drives a white Astro van with tinted windows during the day. I'll just let that sink in. mmmkay.....It's very comforting. It's also opposite day.  

-I should really apologize to my fake husband for greeting him loudly when returning from the fire drill and making him seem like a real jerk for staying in the apartment. But...have you seen our neighbor?! 

-Apparently I live with a LOT of X-factor fans who are not happy with fire alarms going off during the season premiere.....one fan also happens to be a hoarder. Vom.

Here's a to a fire-free-day.
XO, A

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19 comments:

PrettyPhysicist said...

bahahaha ... you make me very happy to be a homeowner without creepy neighbors.

Your "fire departure" outfit sounds very "Valentine's Day" :) I'm sure it was bringing ALL the boys to the yard. and I totally love that you greeted your fake husband because of the creepster neighbors - I'd have done the same.

meghan said...

Oh Lord. That sounds like the worst night ever. I would be so mad I couldn't even go back to sleep. Sorry about your neighbor...and Jim. Tell your imaginary husband hello! :)

P!nky said...

Bahahahaha, it's opposite day!

I remember those in college, but there you were protected by RAs.

Creeptastic neighbors are craycray!

I would think you were cute if you had a fish bowl. :)

but I th ink you're cute anyway

Heidi said...

hahah! I always think about my outfit too! And I always grab my retainers. Because after 13 years of no braces I still can't live a night without them!

I really love that you greeted your pretend husband. Keep those creepers away!

megan said...

haha I feel like this isn't our first fire drill post. i love hearing the stories that come out of them. :)

meme-and-he said...

hahaha...I totally know what you mean. We had a fire alarm go off the other night at 3am, and I literally thought the world was ending. I sat straight up and said "david!! what do we even do?!" and then we grabbed our dog and ran outside, only to realize we forgot our tortoise, and is that really bad? I mean, its a tortoise, but he is part of our family...
so, clearly, it was a stressful night. you aren't alone.

Chelsea Coleen said...

Ok, you are so cute. The way this was written made me smile. First. Let’s talk fish. You need to buy a beta fish. My beta fishy Is THREE years old. the girl is the coolest. I will leave her with a lot of food when I go visit stone for 4 or so days and when I come back, she is still going strong! I also learned to not feed them every day, and it’s not so she stays nice and slim for all the other fishies in the sea, its because if you feed them every other day they live longer. Or so “they” say. So, I don’t know. I just feel like even during a fire drill or fire, the beta fish would be such a warrior and probably fight the fire herself and live to tell about it. Just some words of wisdom. Second – the “its opposite day” made me laugh. I just feel like you needed to know that. OK miss you!! excited for blogger meet up fun time birthday celebrating next weekend!

Joanna said...

haha this is too funny!

Love your blog, girl! I'm a new follower!

Shannon said...

No - you DO need a fish to carry out at every fire alarm. B/c then maybe Jim will think you're weird and wont talk to you about college five years ago. Uhhuh.

Rissy said...

This is why I'm saying I want to live in a bubble with a bunch of good looking, well dressed people. Then a fire drill really would be a block party! whoop whoop... come live in my bubble (I'll even allow your pink shorts and red top)

Angel said...

awwwh so funny and this makes me miss you even more! definitely what i needed to brighten my stressful day. love you :)

Lacey in the City said...

This. Was funny! Sounds like you have some super creepo, weirdo neighbors!

jayme said...

hold up. opposite day? AWESOME!

and in all reality, i really want you and randy to come to the wedding. love love you!!!

katie michelle said...

Oh, boy. The joys of apartment living! Do your best to stay away from the creeps, Ashley. I like the fake husband thing. That was good. Even if he IS a jerk, at least he'll protect you from white-astro-van guy.

Bonnie said...

That is the worst part of living in an apartment. I wouldn't be able to handle that!

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Alex said...

I'm concerned about you and the creeper neighbors!!

Jessie said...

Hysterical post!! Quite the interesting complex you live in

Katie said...

Ashley, I think you need to hire a bodyguard to protect you from all those creepy neighbors. Sounds like a very interesting evening haha

Abigail Kirby said...

Here’s what I call a unique fire story. :) Yep, fire alarms are always serious obviously because of the danger, but many think of it as one way to meet people (but I’m not sure if you’re happy with that or not). Anyway, may I ask what caused the fire? Stay safe!

Abigail Kirby